Stan: Huh? [Splat] Mr. Hankey: Folks'll gather 'round the fire, sing a song that's from a choir, pretty soon they'll all retire and I'll say howdy ho! You can break my heart if that means we can make love, cause if we don't. Spreading joy with a "Howdy-Ho!" Mr. Garrison: Hey, you're the ones whoe made it this way. You people focus so hard on the things wrong with Christmas that you've forgotten what's so right about it. Stan: Kyle, I think you better get home and get some sleep. Kyle: Mr. Hankey? Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo Lyrics South Park – Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo. Mayor McDaniels: Oh my God!! Mr. Broslofski: Now you go brush your teeth, and march into bed. Mr. Hankey: Come on gang, don't fight. Nerd: Stupid wop dago. The Lyrics for The Most Offensive Song Ever by Kenny McCormick & Mr. Hankey have been translated into 1 languages Howdy Ho! I mean, you're one screwed up little kid, do you understand? Sister: That one! Kyle: Officer Barbrady! I'm a Jew, a lonely Jew, on Christmas. Nerd: Now this is very simple. Cartman: Oh good, Kyle's mom is here to ruin Christmas. Kyle: [Singing]Hannukuh is nice, but why is it, that Santa passes over my house every year? Crowd: [Singing]Mr. Hankey the Christmas poo, he loves me, I love you, therefore vicariously he loves you, even if you're a Jew. Mr. Garrison raises his hand. [Gasp] The kids are run outside into the playground. Sand. Kyle: No dude! Cartman: [One of the 3 wise men]Ohhhh. (Pffffft) Having imaginary friends is fine Kyle, but this simply will not do! Cartman: Oh boy, super bitch is at it again. Kenny: That's nasty. Kyle is let out of his cell and runs outside to join the crowd. Stan: I believe. Sheila: That isn't all mayor, the school play is doing a Nativity scene. Kyle: I said go away, my dad says you're not real. Cartman: Uh, Kyle, come on, seriously, you're really reaching right now. Receptionist: Any allergies? Small and brown he comes from you `Cause he's a piece of poo Stan: What, what is this about Christmas poo dude? Original Songs. Dance!!! Mr. Hankey The Christmas Poo. Why? "Kyle's Mom's a Stupid Bitch" even made it into the theatrical film South Park: Bigger, Longer, Uncut.. Counselor: Well, it, it's my understanding that you, uh, mm, you have an acute case of fecalphilia. Shot of shark swimming in the tank. Kyle: Damn it! [Signing]Wellll, Kyle's mom's a bitch! Mr. Hankey: Golly, that isn't very nice! Counselor: Well of course he does. Mayor McDaniels: Anyway, I'll put together a crack team of my best workers to make sure this will be the most non-offensive ever, to any religious or minority group of any kind. Cartman: Yeh, we'll see you later Kyle. The Ultra-Vibe Pleasure 2000. Kyle: Sorry. I'm going to say words and the computer will measure how offended you are by them. Everybody walks off, leaving Kyle alone. Mr. Garrison: Could we get rid of all the Mexicans? [Downtown South Park] Kyle: Wait, you guys, he's alive. Stan: You guys, I'm getting that John Elway football helmet for Christmas. Cartman: Gross Kyle! Stan: Christmas poo? In this way we can find out which words are least offensive for use in the holiday season. Mr. Garrison: Wait a minute, wait, wait, wait. We have to go to the mall and tell Santa Claus what we want for Christmas. [THE END?] Kyle: Oh no! The fighting continues. Sheila: Our family doesn't celebrate Christmas. Sheila: Your father's right Kyle. Mayor McDaniels: Excuse me? Brother: Mr. Hankey Construction set. Kyle: Mr. Hankey! And he wont drop off .. and so you shake your ass around Mr. Hankey: Howdy Ho! Wendy[as the Virgin Mary] is breathing and panting as though in labor. [Singing]Santa Claus is on his way, he's loaded goodies on his sleigh, drop 'em off on Christmas day, and I'll say howdy ho! And what the fuck is up with lighting all these fucking candles, tell me please. Mayor McDaniels: Lose the mistletoe. Mr. Garrison: Oh, okay. Announcer: That's right kids, now you can make your very own Mr. Hankey. Stick me in your mouth and try to say Counselor: Now I also understand that you're Jewish, is that right Kyle? Mr. Hankey: Well, I've got a long night ahead of me. Stan: What's that? Cartman: I'm not fat! And be careful not to fall in that little pool below you Kenny, the shark for the third act is in there. [Dramatic Music] Jesus: Happy Birthday to me, happy birthday to me. Mr. Broslofski: Huhhhh. A bird flies overhead, pooping in Kenny's mouth. Sondr & Keelan Donovan - Swim Lyrics, RADWIMPS - Cocorononaca - Complete Version Lyrics, William Black feat. Townswoman: Yes, and there's nothing Christian either. Kyle: It's a surprise. Kyle: Dreidel dreidel dreidel I made you out of clay, dreidel dreidel dreidel, with dreidel I will play, second verse same as the first, dreidel dreidel dreidel I made you.... Kyle: Here, just look more closely at it. The End appears on the screen. Mr. Hankey Visits Kyle Season 1 E 9 • 12/17/1997 Mr. Hankey comes out of the toilet and proves he's real by singing Kyle a Christmas Song, but goes limp when Mr. Broflovski walks in. Mr. Hankey: Howdy Ho! Kyle is in a padded cell. Mr. Garrison: Oh brother. Kyle: I said Ike's on fire. Ike: Uh oh, the flames, uh oh. Sheila: This is for your own good boobie. Kyle: Yeh, we'll show them! Toilet: Kyyyyle. Cartman: You're not gonna ride around on Santa's sleigh, cause you're a Jew, Kyle! Hankey’s Christmas Classics,” released on December 1, 1999. Mr. Hankey: You should be wearing socks to sleep Kyle, you're gonna catch a cold. Followers: Hallelujah! I wish our little Kyle were here to see it. Kyle: We can too. It isn't being sensitive to the Jewish community. Goons: Jacket, jacket, come with me ..... We've all heard of Rudolph and his shiny nose And we all know Frosty whose made out of snow But all of those stories seem kind of... gay [Auditorium] The mayor clears her throat. Kyle gets caught with poo in … Mr. Garrison: Okay kids, get ready to take your places. Chef opens up the school play with his non-offensive, non-denominational song "I'm Gonna Lay You Down By the Yule Log". Kyle wanders as he's singing. Mr Hankey - Mr. Hankey The Christmas Poo Lyrics. Kyle: Say something Mr. Hankey. This is a live action commercial for Mr. Hankey. Townsman: Wait, wait, there's a star above the stage; that's very offensive to non-Christians. Kyle: What's that? [Silence] [Laughter] Kyle: Shut up fat boy! Mr. Garrison: Careful now Kenny. Soon the whole crowd is clapping and cheering. Sometimes he practically water. Priest: Yeh, it's because the Jew said it couldn't be Christian. [Singing]Mr. Hankey the Christmas poo, he loves me and I love you, therefore vicariously he loves you, even ... Kyle: Well, you're gonna be sorry when you see me riding around on Santa's sleigh with Mr. Hankey fat ass! Cartman: Is this some kind of Jewish tradition?!? 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